I promised you weekly updates on the five CrossFit Open workouts and weekly updates I shall provide…even though this one is tough to write.

I dreaded this workout for days. I tried the 75# shoulder to overhead to test out how it felt and it felt HEAVY. I skipped the group WOD on Friday night and didn’t do it during the Saturday morning class either. I ended up doing it at the last minute on Sunday afternoon with a friend counting/scoring and one other person doing it with me so I wouldn’t be solo. Bad idea. I should have sucked it up and done it earlier so I a) had the energy of the group and b) had time to do it a second time if necessary.

I was so freaked out about the shoulder to overhead but that actually ended up being the least painful part of the workout. Adrenaline kicked in and I powered through them and push press the weight up. I just wasn’t prepared for how much this workout was going to burn. I went out too quickly (you would think I would know better after my years of road races) and was totally gassed after the first 2 minutes.

There was a lot of talk around the gym on how to approach the box jumps. After getting feedback from several other girls I decided to go with step ups. I started with stepping up and jumping down and eventually that turned into stepping up and stepping down. I was hoping it would act as active recovery but it was freaking HARD to step up and down from a 20″ box. My booty was so sore the next day. I can’t imagine having done the box jumps. There is no way my legs would have worked to jump during this workout. I was so grateful for the step up option.

I was a baby at times during this workout. I came off the bar too many times. Took too many breaks. Five minutes in I thinking I was just going to quit, CrossFit was stupid, why am I doing this to myself? Oh the mind games…To be fair, my body has been all kinds of off lately as I’ve shared with my running. Everything has felt harder than normal and has burned and winded me more than usual. Not sure what’s going on but it needs to go.

My goal was to break 200. Which wasn’t a really competitive score but something that would make me happy. I looked up to my friend Lauren who was counting for me with 2 minutes left to go with the sad realization that I wasn’t going to make it. I ended up getting 193. I was disappointed with my score and to give you full disclosure…it was the lowest score of all the girls (and guys) competing at my gym.

I wish there had been time to do it again with lessons learned but I procrastinated and there simply wasn’t. I had to swallow my pride and own coming in last. This is why I love CrossFit. It humbles me. It pushes me. It leaves me longing to become stronger, faster and better. The bitter is definitely that I wasn’t competitive in this workout. The sweet is that it motivated me to work harder and showed me all kinds of ways that I can improve.

Unfortunately, I don’t foresee 13.3 going much better given that it involves muscle ups…which I have yet to master but I’ll try regardless. That is if I even get to the muscle ups after wall balls and double unders. I am still a disaster at double unders…it has to be a very good day for me to string any together.