I hope your Sunday morning is off to a beautiful start. I just poured a cup of coffee and took that magical first sip and thought I’d sit down and write a coffee chat post since it’s been many months since I’ve done so.
If we were chatting over coffee I would share…that last week was a tough week. I found out on Tuesday morning that my uncle died on Monday night after battling with cancer for most of this year. It’s my mom’s brother and my heart is broken for her over all that she’s had to endure in 2016. I saw my therapist on Thursday and told her I was having a hard time sharing this with anyone because I almost felt guilty for having more bad news to share when I’ve already received an unimaginable amount of love and support this fall. She said her wish for me is that I would share the news because this is the reality of life. There’s no timeline on how long one should grieve or limit on many bad things can happen to someone. Like I’ve said so many times over the last couple of months, not talking about the hard times only makes us feel more separated from each other and alone in our feelings. So here is me practicing that and sharing this with you.
To be completely honest, I still feel really sad a lot these days. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about my brother and wish desperately for a different outcome.
I read this quote to my yoga class on Monday night and shared it on social media. When I woke up the next morning to hear the news about my uncle, the words rang even more true. This is a sad season in life right now but I know that it’s not forever. In the meantime, I am finding joy in small moments and things, celebrating with friends who are having the best days and trying to be okay with staying where I am right now for however long I need to be here.
To present this idea to you a different way, a friend of mine recently got engaged at the same time her best friend of 15 years was ending a long-term relationship. While my friend was elated over her engagement, she was feeling so conflicted about telling her friend. When she did, her friend met her in her joy even with her deep sadness. She has so authentically celebrated the love in her friend’s life even though she is experiencing the pain of loss. She’s able to hold this paradox, accept where she is today and truly believe that her better day is on its way.
If we were chatting over coffee I would share…how much I’m enjoying our Peanut Butter Runner Community Facebook group. We have around 500 members now and it’s so awesome to watch so many women from all over the country (and world!) come together. I’d love for you to join us if you haven’t already. It’s a super positive place where you can ask questions, get support and find inspiration.
If we were chatting over coffee I would share…that I’m currently trying to figure out a plan B for the Kiawah Marathon on December 10. My uncle’s memorial service is that weekend in Tampa so clearly I’ll be deferring my registration until next year. The most logistically feasible replacement race would be the Charleston Marathon on January 14 but I’m conflicted. Part of me feels grateful for the opportunity to get a few more long training runs in because I could definitely benefit from a couple more 16-20 milers. The other part of me is ready to get this over and done with…especially with the holidays coming up along with the days being shorter and the temperatures dropping. (I’m a wussy cold weather runner.)
Thoughts overall? Race suggestions? Has anyone run Charleston?
On a similar note, I bagged my 20-miler this weekend. I woke up on Friday feeling kind of terrible all over. My back was bothering me, the right side of my hips/glutes were all locked up and I was tired. I practiced yoga slowly and mindfully on Friday and Saturday, have been rolling out my glutes and psoas with a ball and slept for 10 hours last night. I’m feeling a lot better. I’m going to go out for 6-7 this afternoon and then calling it a week. I’ll resume the long miles next week but I needed to listen to my body this weekend. I was definitely at the point where pushing would have led to injury.
And that’s all I’ve got for right now. I’m going to make our Sunday breakfast and then head off to ALDI to do some shopping for a recipe project. I’ll be testing Thanksgiving salads this afternoon and I’m also going to make a big pot of chili. It’s cold in Charlotte today and chili sounds like just the right thing to have on hand this week.
Much love to all of you. xx