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It’s Friday night and I am cozied up on my grandmother’s couch with HGTV on in the background. I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be after the events of this week. Mema and Finn are both sleeping and I’m settling in to write this post.

It was a hard week. It was a heavy week. It was a sad week. My heart is shattered into pieces over the school shooting in Uvalde and I can’t shake it. One friend lost her husband unexpectedly to a rare blood cancer leaving her a widow and their nine-month old daughter and three-year-old son without their dad. Another friend lost her 11-year-old daughter to rare sarcoma after a tumultuous two-year fight. And another friend is recovering from a double mastectomy after being diagnosed with breast cancer.

I walked with Dorie one day just let the tears flow as we talked about all of it. I want to acknowledge and validate for all of us that living on planet earth these last few years has not been easy or simple. We are all dealing with things like the pandemic, political divisiveness and gun violence while also dealing with our own personal struggles. It’s a lot. Sometimes it’s really overwhelming. Sometimes it’s downright paralyzing. How do we keep going when we’re surrounded by so much hardship and loss?

For me, it’s continuing to focus on doing the next best/right thing and staying connected to the people that I love and the things that ground me. I know that I am not adding any good to the world if I go into a hole. It feels impossible sometimes to stay out of it but practicing gratitude, serving others and choosing to see the abundant blessings in my life helps tremendously.

The title of this post comes from an Instagram post that Dr. Becky Kennedy shared. It was a guide for when bad things happen and offered guidance for taking care of yourself so you can be a leader for your children. She reminded us that there’s no one “right” way to navigate these times and that it feels hard because it is hard.

This week has felt impossible, but I’ve also had moments of joy, peace and happiness. The ultimate practice of accepting and embracing paradox.

Here are a few of the blessings.

FINN FINISHES THREES

Finn finished his first year of preschool ever! His first year was cut short due to the start of the COVID and he didn’t go the following year due to the ongoing pandemic. He went to three days a week this year and absolutely thrived in the threes! He’s in a play-based preschool that feels like one big family and I can’t put a price on how grateful I am that I feel like he’s safe there.

Although I was hugging him extra hard with a heaviness in my heart during the last day celebrations. It’s hard to believe that we only have one year of preschool left (unless we redshirt him).

FLORIDA FAMILY TIME

We are in Florida for a long Memorial Day weekend and I’m excited to be here for a few reasons.

  • It’s always wonderful to see my grandmother and Finn was ready for some Mema time!
  • It’s our first visit since my parents have been home from Durham! The first time we’ve all been together in Florida since last June!
  • Finn gets to meet FIVE KID COUSINS and other family that he’s never met! My dad’s sister’s family is all coming in tomorrow and Sunday so we’re having a mini family reunion! I’ll share more after the fact.

My mom is doing so well. She picked us up from the airport yesterday on her own. She spent the whole afternoon on the beach and at the pool with us today. Her energy is great and for the first time in over a year, it feels like we are having a “normal” Florida visit.

okaloosa island

Think Finn’s overjoyed to be here? It’s hands-down our happy place. <3

WELCOME BEAU

My parents said goodbye to sweet Sam just a few days after arriving home to Florida after my mom’s double lung transplant. I can’t even begin to thank you guys enough for your loving comments about Sam’s passing. We miss him so, so much.

golden retriever

That said, my dad just needs a dog in the house and he’s always quickly gotten another dog after losing one. It’s absolutely nothing negating the former dogs importance. He’s just a dog person through and through and through and needs one close. My mom is also a true dog lover but could probably handle a little more space between dogs than my dad. It’s not right or wrong, just different ways of being and dealing.

Sooooo….welcome Beau.

four year old golden retriever

My dad was researching golden rescues and somehow came across a breeder three hours away where the retired veterinarian owner had passed away and his children were rehoming the remaining puppies, moms and studs. My mom and dad went to meet two of the studs, Sam and Beau, and came home with Beau. Can you believe that one of the dogs was named Sam!? It would have been my parents third rescue golden named Sam in a row!

golden retriever and toddler

Beau turns five in June and is fitting right in with the fam. He’s got all of the best golden mannerisms and is kind of obsessed with Finn! We don’t know if he was really ever around kids but he is enamored by Finn, and Finn with Beau. Finn calls him “Mr. Beau” and it’s so cute.

LOKAH SAMASTAH SUKHINO BHAVANTU

As always, thank you for being here. I’m saying a prayer for all of us tonight. Here’s the prayer I shared with my yoga classes all week last week.

Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu

May all beings everywhere be happy and free, and may the thoughts, words, and actions of my own life contribute in some way to that happiness and to that freedom for all

jen peanut butter runner

Very much looking forward to a few more days at the beach and the arrival of more family tomorrow. <3

QUESTIONS

How is your heart? 

What blessings are you grateful for right now? 

How are you spending your Memorial Day weekend? 

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